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Being healed from the traumas in your life can be best described as exhilarating, freeing, and thrilling. To finally break free from the burdens that have mentally and emotionally weighed you down is something that we all strive for in this thing called life. Healing from the hurt in your life is an intentional, internal process that certainly takes its time, and during this process, there will certainly be obstacles that will attempt to detour you from that.

Though healing may be your desire, it can be challenging. The healing process will require you to unlearn all of what you are most comfortable with and practice a new way of thinking. What most don’t share about the process of healing is that it takes a lot of determination and consistency. To be better, you must truly want to be better. There will be situations that arise just to test your growth. Reverting to your old ways and thought processes will only hinder your growth. With determination and consistency, one day at a time, you will begin to feel the shackles of your mind starting to fall at your feet. If you stay the course, you will be so happy that you did. Here are a few hurdles you may encounter during your healing process:

  • Forgiveness – One of the hardest hurdles is choosing to forgive those who have wronged you. Forgiveness is for you, not for others. More times than not, when we hold onto resentment, the perpetrator has moved on and most likely forgotten about the situation. When you choose to forgive, you are allowing yourself to look forward and release the negative feelings that you may feel towards someone. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you’ve forgotten; it simply means you will no longer allow that anger or sadness to consume you.
  • Retraining Your Mind – By nature, humans are a force of habit. That parking spot we always use, that same route to work we take, or even the food we order: we subconsciously choose what’s comfortable and familiar to us. However, the path to healing will require some things from you that you aren’t familiar with. It’s completely normal to get overwhelmed with the struggle and consider giving up. When this happens, it is important to focus on the end goal. Our minds are a powerful thing, and what we tell ourselves, we eventually believe. When the going gets tough, things like affirmations and mantras can help you to recenter your thoughts.
  • Sadness & Grief – When you make the decision to put your past traumas and heartbreaks in the rear view, those who aren’t ready for change may no longer seem relatable to you. People and things that once interested you may no longer, and because of this, the healing process can make you feel lonely. Sometimes you outgrow people, and that’s okay. You must continue to focus on yourself and what makes you happy. Grieve the fact that the relationship has run its course, and that life is simply taking you in two different directions. The people who are meant for you will respect and understand your decision.

Healing isn’t a pretty process, but remember that it is necessary in the growth and development of who you’re trying to become. Be easy on yourself, and know that each day will present a new set of challenges. However, you can do this, and you’re so much stronger than you think. The best is yet to come. Happy healing!


Kendra Johnson is a Tallahassee native and Mom of three. Since childhood, writing has always been her outlet for self-expression. In 2017, Kendra founded There’s Mommy Then There’s Me, a brand that helps women to differentiate their identities between their role as a Mother, and their role as a human being. Kendra posts weekly blogs on her website: www.theresmommythentheresme.com, and she has a YouTube channel where she recaps her blogs. You can follow Kendra on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube at: theresmommythentheresme.